I’m still working on my photo series (keatontaylor.carbonmade.com), less in the last couple weeks because of computer issues and such. The basic idea is decay. I’ve got two that are figured out and just need to be worked on more photos and figure out the idea for the end. I’ll outline it for those of you who care: The decay is (so far) urban and rural decay. I think the last decay may be human? The idea of decay has always been attractive to me. Running around inside abandoned houses we broke into back home, hanging out in the woods building forts and huts and general people watching have always been things I loved. I throw people watching in there because people are the last great decay of the world. We’re the reason so many things are so fucked. Global warming, war and genocide are all products of humanity or a lack of humanity, really.
Urban decay is based on houses and such in the area that are dilapidated and/or haggard looking. General lack of ability to do basic upkeep in the Northern area around Joplin makes for interesting subjects. It’s not the fifth ward in Houston or MLK in Louisville, but it’s definitely not the best neighborhood. I think most of the reason I love this neighborhood is the condition. If I had a way with words to make it sound less like bullshit and more like legitimate reasoning, I would say the urban decay is some sort of metaphor for human decay and it ultimately foreshadows the actual human decay i will show later in the series. I’ve reasoned through that and I just can’t justify trying to explain that to people and keep a straight face.
Rural decay is based on the area I lived in during high school. Off the beaten path and out of the way, the area I’m working with was once a scrap yard. I lived less than a football field away from a junk yard for about 6 years. After I moved out the man who owned all of the junk (he thought the things he had were absolute treasure, like you do.) passed away. At which point his children/the rest of his family sold the hundred or so scrap cars and trailer homes he had on that lot. A family lived in one of the gutted trailers for a few months when I was about 17. The family went as far as to butt two trailers side to side and make a makeshift doublewide. I always wondered what it was like in there, I never went in and for the most part they kept to themselves. It kind of blows my mind now, knowing about the conditions in parts of africa and the genocide in Rwanda. I feel like when I was younger and felt terrible for the people with the makeshift doublewide I was maybe selling short the fact that were they in africa, that would be damn near a mansion in certain communities. It’s strange how our perspectives change as we get older and more informed and furthermore the fact that no matter how informed we think we are, we’re still ignorant.
Human decay is a hard idea to pin down some days. I think about doing human decay as people at the bar drinking their sorrows away or maybe a transient near souls harbor. Other times I think of human decay as the guy in a business suit living his life out of a suitcase and connecting with people only through his blackberry. Maybe human decay is something inside us, something a photo cannot fully reveal. Maybe it’s the part of us as a people that doesnt give a shit. Then again maybe it’s the instinct that pushes us to use plausible deniability to shield ourselves from consequence or condemnation for our ignorance. Maybe ignorance isn’t even the real problem, maybe it’s an excuse for us to feel more safe from the things we don’t want to know about. There’s a large population that feels safer listening to FOXnews and knowing the war is going well and we’re really policing the hell out of those “sand ni–ers” and THAT is human decay. The thirst for truth has left so many human beings and consequently so many peoples’ brains are decaying. What is human decay? Is it visual or internal? is it your shitty clothes and substance addiction? Is it your unwillingness to know about how many people were/are killed in rwanda, burma and sudan?
I feel like I’ve been yelling at someone.
The fact is, that none of this is directed at anyone but myself.
I went a very long time not caring about anyone but myself… and i still don’t most days, but maybe this year will be my call to arms? Maybe this year will be the year I try and help someone other than me.
I guess we’ll see.
in other news:
after work this afternoon I bought a 32 oz can of monster energy drink.
I came home and here I am listening to Doug Stanhope and feeling fairly offended but laughing all the same.
I am going to a laundromat to do laundry today for the first time since I was about 21.
I’m kind of excited.
It should be fun.
